Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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