did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Life without a bra equals bliss.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Randomize
