It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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