I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
