I CAN MOONWALK!
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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