i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
I have feelings that need drinking.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
