At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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