I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
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