I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Randomize
