Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
We got so high we made milksteak
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
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I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
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I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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