don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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