How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
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Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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