I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
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