I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
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