apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
Randomize
