he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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