i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Randomize
