I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
