addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Randomize
