SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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