Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Randomize
