He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
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