I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I think your dad took our porno
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
