yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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