So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize
