I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
God I need to hump something, right now.
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