my sisters under your porch take her home
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
