evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
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