I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Randomize
