ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Randomize
