Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
My dick has a subreddit
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
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