doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
Randomize
