i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
Woke up backwards on a recliner
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
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