let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
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