I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
