at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Randomize
