so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
