I'd wear matching sweaters with you
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
Randomize
