He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Randomize
