How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
I bet he comes in French.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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