Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
i think i have herpe
just one?
Michael Bay diarrhea
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
Can I color on your dick again?
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
Randomize
