Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
Just woke up in bed, AC on high, with a fresh pack of smokes, an unopened pint of vodka, and a bag w a beef patty w cheese in it. I think my roommate's like the toothfairy or something. Or that was way more Xanax than I needed.
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I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
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I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
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