You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
