Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
got a blowjob in the bar bathroom, got arrested for public intoxication, and found a big bag of weed on the ground on my walk home from the station. my friday night could have been a movie
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
