I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
