i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
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