If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
Randomize
