what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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