too bad you live with your parents still
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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