We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Randomize
