My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
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