there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
